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  • #6979
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    Some comments:

    loral is mediumsized island.

    -> medium sized
    Slon is littleknown.
    –> little known

    Vormain medium- to smallsized islands. coasts, but a few deepsea islands. widelyknown.
    –> small sized
    –> deep sea
    –> widely known

    Socalled.
    –> so called

    The Zeven Islands north of Kahar’s Sea of Fog were the – in the map they are zevan islands

    Now Serfo is now a center of fishing and ruled by the Thellini Republic.

    –> Now Serfo is a center…

    MoKato year sanction how the born ones will travel
    –>???

    Font
    highlypaid foreign mercenaries
    –> highly paid

    Alone among the citystates of Fonrit
    –> city states

    The second bepalafio name is not in italics

    Gaskalli are NOT the largest erronoru tribe

    –> there seems to be one that is larger?

    A winding road leads from down to the bay.
    –> ???

    In Jolar

    Yearround?
    –> year round?

    All nonChaotic intelligent
    –> non Chaotic ???

    socalled because the men rode horses.
    –> so called

    Is it Arbennan Kingdom or Confederation?
    –> in one place it is Arbennan Kingdom

    motherinlaw
    –> mother-in-law ???

    Estere and R’sfard almost same text same goes for zamantak so
    –> text is even longish – perhaps it should just refer to the other guys and probably have some little color specific to the place

    brightlycolored
    –> brightly colored

    #6980
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    “divine home of Enmal. His other footprints include Tshukudu Marsh and Chuchwe Marsh” is it Tshukudu or Tshukundu marsh – both ways in this page. pamalts hone is mentined to be two different places on this page as well

    #6981
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    Is Nukalofa cycle correct on the mother of monster map. Everywhere else the cycle is 148 days when counted together….

    #6982
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    Same would go for the entry of Nukalofa in the text

    #6983
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    In maslo text. “3footdiameter” should probably be three words

    #6984
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    Should jungledwelling be two words

    #6985
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    In tariw

    The valley is impassible

    — impassable?

    #6986
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    “and then rises up to 30 feet,”

    Should it be rise up?

    #6987
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    Monbu has pretty much the same text on Agitori than three other entries. Perhaps they should refer to a single instance and some additional different text should be provided

    #6988
    Profile photo of Peter Metcalfe
    Peter Metcalfe
    Spectator
    Quote:
    Quote from Mark Mohrfield on February 24, 2014, 16:05
    Voyans are listed on the population list on page 584 as humans, but page 591 seems to indicate that they are non-humans.

    Simply because everybody calls them sea goblins doesn’t mean they aren’t humans. They are called goblins because they are vile not because they are red elves.

    #6989
    Profile photo of Mark Mohrfield
    Mark Mohrfield
    Spectator
    Quote:
    Quote from Peter Metcalfe on February 25, 2014, 01:37
    Simply because everybody calls them sea goblins doesn’t mean they aren’t humans. They are called goblins because they are vile not because they are red elves.

    Well, the passage reads “The Voyans are semi-amphibious, natural swimmers,thrive in the wet heat, and can hold their breath for over an hour. Also called Sea Goblins, the Voyans are aggressive against other races and are believed to eat humans.”

    I realize that this being Glorantha none of this is absolute proof that they aren’t human, but without their listing under humans in the population section even the possibility never would have occurred to me. I never believed they where red elves, FWIW.

    #6990
    Profile photo of Hannu Kokko
    Hannu Kokko
    Spectator

    Its university graduated fifty thousand fullyqualified

    Probably needs to be fully qualified

    #6991
    Profile photo of Jonathan Geere
    Jonathan Geere
    Spectator

    Page 541 change Moino: to Moino Jungle:

    Map on Page 565 has the Forest of Disease but no mention in the text other than Page 556 with ‘The Hero Wars Begin’. Deserves better given its involvement in the future, but too late to add this to the main body of text. Maybe an add on as a side text?

    Page 440 Possibly change …were driven over the River; [which is, IIRC, in Dragon Pass]
    to
    …were driven over the Good River;
    or
    …were driven over the river;
    or
    …were driven over the River of Cradles;

    Page 476. Possibly change: Kuma river to Kuma River (and is it on the map: hard to see)
    Page 481. Possibly change: Riomava river to Riomava River
    Page 560. Possibly change: Gargos and Rana Rivers to Gargos and Rana rivers (elsewhere multiple names –> river)
    Page 635. Possibly change: Ediruss and Opiruss Rivers to Ediruss and Opiruss rivers

    Page 559: large black murderous Chaos monsters of diabolic cunning called Grue…cool 😉

    #6992
    Profile photo of Charles
    Charles
    Keymaster

    Page 524: Their ancestral entities were the Joserui, now worshiped as the gods of Vormain.

    The zenshin assist the Emperor in serving and administering the Joserui (the gods and spirits of Vormain).

    The Joserui are the celestial gods of Vormain, and ancestors of the Vormaino.

    Repetition on the same page?

    Page 538: ‘andrewsarchus’, ‘arsinoitherium’, ‘gigantopithecus’ – different font faces and sizes – is this deliberate?

    Page 540: After his epic, Errinoru was named SevenConqueror.

    SevenConqueror – missing space or hyphen?

    Page 553: Bepalafio (small city): This city on Njenaguya Island is built on the side of a granite outcrop and it is an important export center for wood, honey, and wax. It is surrounded by extensive fortifications.
    Bepalafio (small city): This city in Laskal is built on a hill overlooking the port and is surrounded by two walled enclosures. The ruler’s palace, made of red sandstone and called the Tower of Lassana, stands over 250 feet tall and serves as palace, lighthouse, fortress, and observatory. It is sometimes called Lassana City to distinguish it from the Kareeshtan city of the same name.

    Bepalafio: two different descriptions of the same city? Or city name incorrectly duplicated and a different city name missing?

    #6993
    Profile photo of Peter Metcalfe
    Peter Metcalfe
    Spectator
    Quote:
    Bepalafio: two different descriptions of the same city? Or city name incorrectly duplicated and a different city name missing?

    The last sentence of the second description does read “It {ie Bepalafio in Laskal} is sometimes called Lassana City to distinguish it from the Kareeshtuan city of the same name”.

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